Does Porn for Women Exist?

Porn is no longer the guilty secret of single, unattractive men or furtive, frustrated husbands. There’s a whole genre of adult films and sites now devoted to female friendly porn. With recent studies and the boom in erotic romance novels–so-called “mommy porn”–showing that women are just as eager as men for some erotic stimulation, you would be forgiven for thinking that pornography is now an equal opportunities product.

Hmmm. Any search on your average porn site will reveal that’s not quite the case. Among the plethora of genres aimed at men, from Asiana to Snowballing (don’t ask) you might find a tiny section devoted to “female friendly porn.” This usually means girl-on-girl scenes or soft core sex, both featuring pneumatic blondes in soft focus lighting. Is this what we really, really want?

If it is, more power to you. Or if you get off on traditional male-orientated porn then go ahead sister, you’ve got plenty of choice! But in my opinion the vast majority of women want something different. We don’t just want female friendly porn (what are we supposed to call the alternative, misogynist porn?). We want porn for women. Aimed at women, using women’s sexual fantasies, even produced and directed by women. It’s a myth that men watch porn while women read erotic romances; we may love our storybooks, but a lot of us are turned on visually too. Or just want a quick fix rather than having to wade through three chapters to get to the juicy bits.

So what is “porn for women?”
I’d love to see some intelligent debate about this, and some serious studies. However, I can only give you my opinion, both as a woman and a former actress within the heavily male-orientated adult industry. Firstly, I believe that we women are in general a little more discerning, therefore we like our porn to at least be moderately realistic. Also, we want the guys to be HOT. No Ron Jeremys please. Less blowjobs, more–actual, not faked, female orgasms–and quite often women enjoy the obvious connection between real couples. Quite simply, we can tell whether a woman is enjoying herself or whether she’s really thinking about what to do the kids for dinner. Here’s my checklist for what I look for in a porn movie;

  • At least somewhat realistic storyline
  • Naturally attractive women
  • Genuine arousal
  • HOT guys
  • Focus on women’s pleasure
  • Where there are girl-girl scenes, the women seem to be genuinely enjoying themselves and not “performing” for a male onlooker
  • Genuine couples, or at least, people who actually fancy each other

Erika LustPorn that is produced and directed by women is usually a good bet. Here are a few names to look out for:
Anna Span
Erika Lust (right)
Petra Joy
Alison Lee, who in 2006 created the Feminist Porn Awards
In an industry dominated by male desires, these women have dedicated their work to making juicy, hardcore, hot porn for women.

A couple of websites worth checking out are sssh.com and forthegirls.com. There are small membership fees–we haven’t yet reached the stage of having free sites exclusively dedicated to female friendly porn–but the content is worth it.

So get on your search engine and have a look around –we all love a bit of shopping don’t we? And next week I’m going to share some thoughts on how you can share your new love of porn with your man. . .


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